We'll see where this goes

Ian talked to me the other day. At about 7 am he showed up at my front door.
I didn't know what to do first of all I was asleep and then i get a call saying "im outside"
so i opened the door and he hands me a letter. i didnt know what to expect it could have been a final good bye it could be a take me back it could have been any thing. . .
He left and told me he didnt have work till 10 and to call him if i choose to talk to him.
I walked back inside and opened it. . .
I didnt get past the first sentence before i began to cry. Reading that letter it broke what i had finally begun to build up (he said the same thing later on but the case was about the same on my end). I had finally begin to ATTEMPT to let go. I started talking to this guy Eric. I tryed my best and i really started to like him. . .and then ian came back.
In the envalope with the letter there was something else . . . the necklace. . .
When i pulled it out and held it in my hand i felt like i was being struck by lightning i began to shake and cry and wail.
I waited two months. TWO FUCKING MONTHS!!!!! of tears and regret and sadness. And when i finally began to heal and let go he comes back.
I told him to meet me in the park and i waited as he walked from his house (at least he was motivated)
As i waited i began to sing. I sang all the songs i have been singing to get me through this.
And then i saw him walking tword me.
we sat down at the same picknik tables he broke up with me the first time and as cold and honest as possable i told him where i stand right now. He explained his reasoning for breaking up with me and why he wasnt talking to me. He told me he was the same ian that was my friend the same ian that went to ultra with me and the same ian i fell in love with and all i could think was
WHAT FUCKING NERVE!!!!
He needs to get his life strait. Stop smoking all the fucking time. Stop being an ass hole to his family who are extreamly good people fix all the realaitonships he ruined because he lied to every one. And after all that i can try to be his friend.
Ian said he doent think he can do that.
My issue is He cheeted once on his other gf
he cheeted on me
he broke up with me once before
and if i took him back how the hell am i supposed to trust him!!!
after our chat he left and i began to think
I still love Ian
But he's still not the ian i knew he needs to get his head on strait
I love the Ian i knew the one who didn't lie the one who had lots of friends who was good in school the one who was an amazing actor
and the Ian that i grew up with
That ian still dosent exist
. . . .if i ever saw that Ian again i would go back to him in a heart beat
But untill i see him again and untill i see a mature adult i can not even imagin being with this person.
It's all up to him
And to be honest its going to be harder than he thinks me im not asking much on my end of things i want the old ian back. However getting all of his friends to trust him again and be friends again, concentrating on studies and his carreer, and really giving a shit about his family is going to be quite a feat. All i can say to the present Ian is good luck it will be harder to convince others than it will be me. Oh and good luck convincing Michelle my best friend.